The Treehouse
by mrs.cookieeater
Summary: Dan Howell and Phil Lester live in a world where being homosexual is a crime. So what happens when Phil's old friend Dan, the popular kid, kisses him in the old treehouse? Will they get caught? Or will they continue their secret relationship? Read to find out. I DO NOT OWN DAN OR PHIL. I DO NOT CLAIM TO. THIS ISN'T REAL, THIS IS ALL FICTION. SLASH INSIDE. DO NOT LIKE? DO NOT READ
1. Chapter 1

Dan Howell and Phil Lester lived in a world where being homosexual was a crime.

When they were younger, they were the best of friends. As close as close could be. One time, they spent three days building a treehouse in the big oak in Dan's backyard. They say they did it, but really, it was more their dads that did all the hard work.

Over the next days, they painted the inside and outside all different colours, like the rainbow, and stuck lot's of pictures on the walls. They took toys up there, and got Dan's parents to help them lift up a sofa, a table and some chairs. They spent most of their childhood in that treehouse, playing games, drawing, talking, laughing. The treehouse brought them closer than they had ever been.

As they got older, and became teenagers, they found their taste in music and looks a little darker than normal people's. They got emo hair cuts, and went into high school best friends. Immediately, they were labelled emo losers, because of the way they looked and talked. Barely anyone paid them attention, and when they did it wasn't good. They got bullied a little, but at least they were still friends.

That was, until Dan started dating one of the popular girls from the year above them, and became the most popular guy in school. He started dating all the girls, and was labelled the heart breaker, leaving Phil to be a loner outcast. They grew apart, and eventually stopped talking altogether, throwing Phil into a depression.

He didn't cut or anything, just moped around his house, never wanting to do anything. His mother worried, and his father wanted to send him to boarding school. His older brother was in University, so he really was all alone.

Until one day, his family got invited over for a barbeque at Dan's house. Their parents were still friends, and it was a nice, summer day to do it. It was quite hot, so Phil wore a short-sleeved, black shirt, and a pair of dark blue shorts. He grabbed his phone and MP3 player, before making his way outside, to their car, where his mum and dad were waiting.

"This should be a fun day, Phillip. Try and do something today." His father said, buckling up his belt and starting the car as his mother looked around her seat.

"Just try and have fun, kiddo. Dan's there, you guys used to be friends. Why don't you have a nice chat with him?" His mum asked, smiling encouragingly as Phil sighed and played with his hair. He hated talking about Dan.

"You know we don't talk anymore, mum. He probably hates me." He grumbled, as his dad began pulling out of their driveway. He wished he could have stayed home. But his mother didn't believe him when Phil pretended to be ill, and so he was stuck going to a house that held painful memories, and longing feelings.

"I'm sure that's not the case, Phil." His mum said, giving him a sympathetic look, before ruffling his hair, and turning around in her seat as his dad began driving towards Dan's house. Phil fixed his hair and sighed, staring at his feet as he waited for it all to be over.

After a ten minute drive (which would have been a half hour walk), they arrived at Dan's house. Phil anxiously played with his hair. He told himself it was because he didn't want to give Dan a reason to tease him.

His mum and dad quickly exited the car, and Phil looked at the ground for a while, before his dad banged on the window, and he was forced to get out.

"Come on honey, its just a barbeque." His mum soothed, petting his hair a little, before rubbing his shoulder comfortably.

"I don't want to be here." Phil whined, scowling at the ground as his dad made his way to the door, and pressed the doorbell. Phil and his mum slowly made their way over to him, Phil trying to come up with an excuse.

"Just be quiet, Phillip. Its just a barbeque, now suck it up and at least pretend to have a good time" His dad ordered sternly, making Phil flinch, and duck his head. He pretended not to hear the quiet "This wouldn't be happening if we just sent him to boarding school." his dad whispered to his mother.

He sulked as Dan's mother opened the door, just as pretty as he remembered. She was a tall woman, with dark skin and dark hair, just like Dan. Though, her eyes were a light blue. Dan got his chocolate eyes from his father. And that was the only thing he got. Through the door, he could see Dan's father out in the back, cooking steaks on the barbeque. He saw Dan descending the stairs at the last moment, just as they were ushered inside.

Dan gave him a small wave, before going back to his phone, and Phil thought for a second he saw a small smile and a blush. But that could've just been his mind.

Phil blushed, and hung his head as he slowly stepped inside the house, Dan's mother smiling and closing the door behind him. His parents talked with her at the door for a while, before he made his way outside, Dan's dad smiling at him as he closed the glass door behind him.

"Phillip!" He cheered, walking over to him, and clapping him on the back, making Phil stumble forward a few steps. "Still clumsy as ever, eh? Its good to see you! My you've grown, haven't you?" He asked, rambling on for ages as Phil just smiled politely and nodded his head. Soon, Dan's dad made his way back over to the barbeque, flipping over the steaks. "The food should be ready soon. Just gotta wait for Jo to bring out all the salads and bread rolls." he said, still smiling widely at Phil.

Phil smiled and nodded, making his way over to the big oak that held almost all his childhood memories. 'Jo' was Dan's mum. Her name was short for Joanne, which apparently, she hated, as Dan told him. And he'd only ever heard Dan's father call her Joanne when they were having an argument.

That was long ago, where their fights were frequent, and very heated. Dan would always cover his ears, tears slipping down his cheeks as Phil held him, and talked to him as a distraction. Phil winced as he began climbing the ladder to their treehouse. Those memories were probably the hardest.

He wondered for a moment if Dan's parents still fought. What did Dan do without him, if that was the case? Phil remembered going over to Dan's house a little later than usual, one afternoon. He let himself in, as usual, because Dan's parents knew him well, and didn't mind him coming in unannounced. Dan's parents were fighting again, and had seemed to be for a while. Phil had frowned, and made his way up to Dan's room.

As soon as he opened the door, Dan flung himself at him, and clutched desperately onto his shirt, tears already staining it. This was the time when Phil was the taller one. Dan cried into his shirt for a while, saying he thought Phil wouldn't come, and that he'd be alone. He thought his parents would leave, and forget about him. That was the worst Phil's ever seen Dan. After that, he made a point never to be late to Dan's house again.

Phil sighed as he reached the top, and opened the door to their treehouse. It was just how he remembered it, scattered drawings, comics, toys, scrunched up paper, the can of paint in the corner they wanted to use to repaint the outside of the treehouse. It even smelled the same. Rotting wood, leaves, old paper, and of course, the smell of Dan. He sighed again, sitting on the floor and biting his lip as his mind flooded with memories.

The treehouse had seemed so big back then, as they ran around the small room. Phil would be the princess, and Dan would be the villain. Phil would have to wear a wig, and borrow a dress from Dan's mum. He remembered having to hike it over his ankles to keep from tripping over, though, inevitably, it would slip from his hands, and he tumble to the floor. Dan would trip on top of him, and their grinning faces would be centimetres apart.

Dan would kiss his cheek, then sit up on Phil's lap and cheer, yelling over and over how he won, and he was the greatest. That he'd claimed his princess. Phil never questioned why Dan always wanted to be the villain. He liked Dan kissing his cheek ever time he won, anyway. The skin would tingle for hours after, and it left a warm, bubbling sensation in his tummy until he got home.

He missed those times. Where everything was so simple, so black and white. Though, that was before homosexuality became illegal, and any act of it would bring you harsh punishment. That was when Dan started acting weird, becoming less affectionate, not letting Phil hold him when he got upset at his parents arguments.

Phil groaned again, pulling his knees up, and resting his hands on them as his head fell back onto the wooden wall behind him. What had even happened between them?

Phil banged his head against the wall, wincing a little, and thinking back to the old times. They were so carefree. What changed? What made Dan think he was too special to hang around Phil?

He was so absorbed in his own thoughts, he didn't hear someone coming up the ladder, until it was too late, and the door was opening. Dan stepped inside, shutting the door behind him. He gave Phil a weird look, before moving to sit across from him, leaning against the opposite wall.

"So... What're you doing in my treehouse?" He asked, frowning a little. Phil's cheeks heated up and he scoffed, already in a bad mood.

"I think you mean 'what am I doing in _our _treehouse?'" He grumbled, scowling at the ground as he peeled a bit of cracking paint from the wall next to him.

"Well, its in _my_ backyard." Dan replied, now scowling as well. Obviously, Phil had just made him annoyed. Too bad, Dan deserved it.

"Well _I _helped build it." Phil grumbled, biting his lip as he moved his hands into his lap, and clenched them into fists.

"What is your _problem_?" Dan asked loudly, sitting up straight, and glaring at him. Phil rolled his eyes.

"I should be asking you the same question!" Phil yelled, glaring back at Dan, making the boy flinch and frown.

"What's that supposed to mean?" Dan asked defensively, crossing his arms over his chest and huffing. Phil couldn't help but think how cute he looked when he was angry. How could a sixteen year old boy be cute? Stupid Phil, you hate him. He hates you.

"It _means_ that you left me for some slut and the popular group! We used to be best friends, then you just started fucking everything that moved!" Phil growled digging his nails into his palms as his face turned dark red.

Dan's eyes widened, and suddenly, he didn't look angry anymore, he opened his mouth like he was about to say something, then closed it again.

"I haven't been fucking them." Dan said quietly, scowling at the ground as he picked at a loose thread on his shirt. Phil just stared blankly at Dan for a moment.

"You're lying." He said bluntly, turning his attention to the wall again, and pulling at some more pealing paint as his hands slowly unclenched.

"I'm not lying!" Dan said suddenly, looking at Phil with anger in his eyes. "I'm a virgin..." he mumbled, making Phil blush and look at his feet. " You wanna know why I date so many girls?" Dan asked, still looking angry as Phil looked up at him, wide eyed.

And then, Dan wasn't sitting across the room, leaning against the wall, he was right in front of Phil, their faces inches apart.

"This is why..." He murmered softly, before leaning in, and connecting their lips in a soft, sweet kiss, his eyes fluttering closed. Phil's eyes went even wider, his blush darkening as he looked at Dan, not kissing back.

When Dan pulled away, Phil touched his fingertips to his lips, his eyes still wide as he tried to catch his breath, his heart hammering in his chest. Dan just kissed him. Dan was a guy. Phil was a guy. That made him homosexual! That's against the law!

"D-Dan..." Phil stuttered, wondering why that kiss felt so good, why his heart wouldn't stop missing beats, and racing way too fast for his liking. He wondered why his palms were sweaty, and why, more than anything else, he wanted Dan to kiss him again.

"You can't deny that felt right." Dan whispered, still sitting directly in front of Phil, his hands on his bare knees, making Phil shudder a little as the skin burned.

"B-but... It doesn't matter if it felt right... Its illegal!" Phil whispered, alarmed, his fingers still touching his scorching lips.

"That's why this has to stay a secret, okay?" Dan asked, frowning worriedly as he placed a palm on Phil's cheek, leaning in and brushing their lips together. Phil let out a strangled noise, before pressing their lips together properly, making Dan smile into the kiss as both of their eyes fluttered closed again.

"O-okay..." Phil whispered as Dan pulled away, looking at the boy with frightened eyes. Dan just smiled even more, his hand rubbing Phil's knee as he stayed in his personal space. Phil could smell the mint on his breath, had he brushed his teeth? Phil giggled breathily, his eyes closing for a moment before he looked at Dan confidently, taking his hand in his own. "Can... Can you kiss me again?" he asked, still blushing.

Dan smirked, leaning in again and- "Boys! The food's done!" His mum yelled, and Dan pulled away just before they kissed, still smirking.

"Save me one for later." He mumbled, winking, rubbing Phil's knees a little before he stood up, and opened the door, climbing down, and leaving Phil alone in the treehouse.

What did he mean by later?

**So. What do you guys think of my new series? It should be lot's of fun! ^_^ hopefully I'll write the next chapter in the next couple of days. I need a distraction from my upcoming birthday, otherwise the days are going to go by very slowly.**

**Remember to R&R, Follow if you want more, and Favourite if you liked it.**

**BYE!**


	2. Chapter 2

**I got great feedback, so here's the next chapter! ^_^**

After a few minutes of sitting in the treehouse, wondering what the hell just happened, Phil finally stood up on shaky legs, and made his way down the ladder. He almost slipped at the bottom, but a pair of arms encircled his waist, catching him before he fell.

"Careful there..." Someone whispered into his ear. Dan. Phil shivered, his skin burning where Dan's hands were on his stomach. His shirt had rode up when he fell, exposing his torso, and most of his back to Dan.

Then, as soon as it had happened, it finished. Dan retracted his arms, and Phil turned around, blushing and pulling down his shirt. Dan smirked, and winked again before making his way towards the table.

Dan seemed confident to Phil, he seemed to know what he wanted, and he was going after it, even though 'it' was against the law. Phil would never be able to be that confident, at least not in public. Surely everyone noticed the way he looked at Dan, surely they noticed how flushed he was, and how he sat directly across from Dan at the table, just so he had an excuse to look at him.

Then, as everyone started eating, a foot began rubbing up and down his leg. It could only be Dan. Phil looked up from his food, to find Dan staring at him, no smirk on his face, but a mischievous glint in his eyes. Phil blushed again, and looked back at his food, trying not to think about the leg that was now rubbing over his knee. He shuddered, he could get seriously turned on if Dan kept on.

Phil cleared his throat as he spread his legs for Dan. The boy had taken off his vans, and now his sock-covered foot was rubbing at his inner thigh. Phil held in a moan, feeling himself getting a little aroused. Dan was still staring intently at him, even though he was eating his food. His foot was moving higher and higher. _Don't get turned on. Don't get turned on._

Then Jo asked Dan a question, one Phil didn't hear, and Dan's foot was gone. Phil let out a breath he hadn't realised he was holding in, going back to his food as his arousal died down into nothing. What was Dan playing at? They could've gotten caught! Dan didn't seem to realise the severity of what they were doing. If they got caught, they would go to prison. Or worse.

Being a homosexual was one of the worst crimes in England, in the government's eyes. Phil didn't know how it happened, or why, but it did, when he was nine years old. He barely remembers anything, but some new person was appointed somewhere in the government, and they suggested the idea to the Queen. Somehow she agreed, and that was the end of that. Homosexuals were outcasts. Phil was glad he was so young when it happened, otherwise he might've gotten a boyfriend by that time, or come out at least. Then some of his closest friends would've ratted him out, and he'd be a criminal.

After a while of eating, talking, and laughing, everyone was finally finished. Phil offered to wash up this dishes, and Jo told him to sit down, guests weren't supposed to help clean up. Then she asked Dan to help her wash the dishes, so Phil was left alone again. They'd had a few conversations while eating, and they caught up. Dan smiled a lot, his proper, dimple-y one that Phil couldn't get enough of. It was the one he never saw at school.

Phil sighed, and got out from his chair, making his way to the treehouse. He didn't want to talk to Dan's dad, or his own parents. He wanted to talk to Dan. He wanted to ask what they were, because he wasn't sure himself. He wanted to know if they were boyfriends, or if Dan just wanted to have sex. But then again, if he just wanted sex, he'd go to a girl for that, wouldn't he. Phil sighed as he climbed the ladder, almost falling again, though this time, Dan wasn't there to catch him.

He blushed at the memory. He could still feel Dan's hands burning against his bare stomach, his breath running down the back of his neck as he whispered 'Careful there...' into his ear. He bit his lip, and kept climbing until he was at the top. He sighed again, though this time in relief as he made his way inside, and laid down on the sofa.

He was so confused. He didn't know what he felt for Dan. But, he liked kissing him, and he felt weird just being around him. The boy had even almost gotten him hard! But what did it mean? He never liked girls, and he'd always been attracted to other guys, he pushed it away because it was wrong, though he knew he was gay.

But, not an hour ago, he hated Dan. And before he started hating him, they were best friends. How do you go from best friends, to enemies to boyfriends? That didn't seem the right word. What were they? Lovers? Friends? Boyfriends? Phil didn't know. The questions just circled around in his head as he threw his arm over his eyes, and swung his legs over the armrest his head laying on the other one. This sofa used to be so big to him, then he grew. Now half his legs hand over the edge.

He sighed, too caught up in his thoughts again to hear someone coming up the ladder. He didn't even hear the door open.

Then, suddenly, there were a set of lips on his own, and someone was crawling on top of him. Phil gasped slightly, moving his arm from his eyes to see a smiling Dan, who was now sitting on his lap, his legs either side of Phil's waist.

"You always were cute when you were confused." he mumbled, biting on his lip before leaning in again, and kissing Phil softly.

"What... We... When..." Phil stuttered, thoroughly confused, and wondering what question to ask first.

"Too many questions to decide which one to ask first?" Dan asked, grinning as he rested his hands on Phil's waist. "That happens to me all the time. Ask the biggest question you got."

Phil bit his lip and blushed, even after all this time, Dan can still read him like a book. "O...Kay? First... What are we? I mean, I don't know how I feel, but... I know I liked kissing you, and I feel weird around you, like how I should around girls... So... What does this mean? How do you feel?"

"That was more than one question, but okay." Dan mumbled, chuckling a little as he got comfortable on Phil's lap. "I want to be with you, I want to do all the things a normal boyfriend would do to a girl, except with you and... not in public. We both know its illegal so we have to keep this a secret. No matter what, okay?"

Phil nodded, and Dan smiled, placing his palm on his cheek, making Phil's skin burn again. Why was it so hot? Phil felt flustered. He couldn't breathe. But he had more questions to ask, so he had to get over it. "That brings me to my next question. What exactly were you doing out there? We could've gotten caught! And if your mum hadn't have asked you that question you would've..." Phil trailed off, blushing. He didn't want to say it. Dan would've rubbed his crotch, and Phil would've gotten turned on. He probably would've moaned.

"I would've...? What? Rubbed your dick? Made you hard? Made you moan? That was the point." Dan said, grinning as he leant down and pecked Phil's nose. "You're so cute when you're flustered. I wanted to see how cute you were turned on."

"But... We could've been caught!" Phil exclaimed, still blushing as he became aware of Dan's bum resting on his crotch. "Someone could've seen! Or, if you turned me on, then someone would have seen I was hard!" He whined, wondering why Dan would want to see him turned on. Dan said he was a virgin, was he horny from never having sex? That couldn't be it. Phil was a virgin as well, and he was fine.

"We wouldn't have gotten caught. You would have stayed at the table until you either came, which would have been totally hot by the way, or until you weren't hard anymore. And as for someone seeing, you have seen our table, right? Its impossible."

"But why would you want to turn me on?" Phil asked, covering his eyes with his arm so he wouldn't have to look at Dan. "It was so sudden. I mean, we barely even know each other..."

"No. I know you, Phil. Have you forgotten the time when we were best friends? You haven't changed. I've been thinking about this for years, waiting for a chance. I saw how jealous you were whenever I had a girlfriend. I saw the way you looked at me, so I knew you wanted this too."

Phil sighed, trying to throw his other arm over his eyes, getting stopped by Dan again. "I still don't understand... Why... Why did you want to turn me on?" he asked, sighing again, wishing his arms were free so he didn't have to look at Dan's gorgeous eyes.

"Well, it was kind of a test, to see your reaction. You seemed embarrassed, but you wanted more, which is a good thing. It means that you will want the sexual side of our relationship, when you're ready. Though you were a little uncomfortable, I don't know if it was because we were in public or not, but I take it as you not being ready. And I can't have any doubts about you, since its my first time as well." Dan explained, smiling down at Phil as he let go of his arms. Phil didn't try to cover his eyes this time.

"So... you weren't lying?" Phil asked quietly, biting his lip and blushing. "We... Aren't going to do anything?"

"Not if you don't want to," Dan answered, smiling, making Phil sigh in relief.

"Sorry its just... I don't think I'm ready. And I thought that's what you wanted..." Phil mumbled, blushing darker as he leant up and connected their lips softly. "I... I think I like you..." he whispered as he pulled away, biting his lip nervously.

"I think I like you too..." Dan mumbled, grinning as he leant down and connected their lips firmly, making Phil sigh happily into the kiss.

For a while, they just sat there, their lips moving slowly in a sweet kiss that made Phil's heart flutter over and over. Then, Dan pulled away, smiling goofily as he stroked Phil's face gently. Phil shuddered under the touch, his lips scorching and his cheek burning where Dan's fingers brushed.

"Can... Can I try something?" Dan asked, his goofy smile falling away as he looked nervous. Phil smiled reassuredly, moving his hands up to tangle in Dan's dark locks, feeling content with whatever Dan wanted to do. Phil nodded slowly, making Dan smile again as he moved his hands to Phil's waist.

He leant down, connecting their lips again, though this kiss was hesitant. Phil made sure to kiss back enthusiastically, letting Dan know he was okay, and wondering what he was thinking about.

He soon found out, when Dan was opening his mouth, and poking his tongue against Phil's lips, testing to see if Phil was okay with it. Phil opened his mouth willingly, moaning softly as Dan's tongue slipped into his mouth. He tugged on Dan's hair a little, letting Dan take control of the kiss as the boy began slipping his hands under Phil's shirt, just resting on his bare waist, making Phil's skin burn.

Phil moaned a little louder, Dan's tongue guiding his as the kiss became hungry, Dan letting go of all precaution as his fingers danced up Phil's skin. Phil whimpered, tugging gently on Dan's hair again, as the boy guided Phil's tongue out of his mouth. Phil panted, his face flushed and his eyes half open, wondering what Dan was thinking. Then, Dan started sucking on his tongue, and all thoughts were thrown from Phil's mind, as he moved to sit up.

He wrapped his legs around Dan as he pulled him as close as he could, tugging his hair a little rougher as he moved to slip his tongue in Dan's mouth this time. He moaned a little louder, pushing his tongue against Dan as they began to battle for dominance in the kiss. Eventually Dan won, his tongue slipping back into Phil's mouth, making him shudder as he felt his heart hammering almost painfully against his chest, his skin burning where Dan's hands trailed up and down his sides.

Then, boiling heat began spreading through his stomach, and his body, making Phil moan and pull away.

"Sorry its just... It was getting a little..." Phil mumbled, panting as his eyes fluttered open again. He hadn't even realised they were closed.

"Its alright, I know what you mean." Dan replied, smiling as he moved his hands from under Phil's shirt. "You didn't want to stop, but you knew you had to. It was getting a little heated..."

"A little? I felt like I was burning..." Phil mumbled, giggling softly as he panted, moving his legs away from Dan's body again, blushing as he untangled his fingers from Dan's hair.

"I guess a bit more than a little..." Dan said quietly, giggling as he moved off Phil's lap, panting as he offered him a hand up, one Phil gladly took.

"Phillip! Its time to leave!" His father yelled, just as Dan pulled him up roughly. Phil whimpered as his body crashed against Dan's, their lips centimetres apart. He hadn't realised how long they had spent up their, kissing, talking.

"I have to go..." Phil whispered, staring into Dan's warm, chocolate eyes.

"I know... Come back soon, Phil..." Dan mumbled quietly, looking sadly at Phil.

Phil smiled, and connected their lips in a sweet kiss.

"I will..." He mumbled, before moving towards the door. Dan whimpered, following Phil closely, and leaning in again, making Phil smile and lean in as well.

"Now, Phillip!" His father yelled, making Phil pull away.

"Save me one for later, yeah?" He asked quietly, winking at Dan before he began climbing down the treehouse, leaving Dan alone in the treehouse this time.

He didn't need to ask. He knew there was going to be one later.

He just hoped it would be soon.

**There you guys go. Chapter 2. How did you enjoy it? Its kind of going a little fast paced, but Dan's had a lot of girlfriends, so he basically knows what he's doing, he knows how to seduce Phil, and he's going to do it. But for now, he's going to go a little slow, show Phil that he cares and stuff, so don't expect smut until at least the tenth chapter. :P**

**By the way, I'm hoping this series will go on for a while, twenty chapters at least. I don't know though, because I don't particularly want to write chapters in school, and summer can't go on forever. ._. so, we'll see how it goes, and what sort of feedback I get.**

**Please tell me if I made any mistakes.**

**I DO NOT OWN DAN OR PHIL. I DO NOT CLAIM TO. THIS IS ALL PURE FANFICTION. NONE OF THIS IS REAL.**

**Thanks for reading! Remember to R&R, Follow if you want more, and Favourite if you liked this fic!**

**BYE!**


	3. Chapter 3

The trip home was quiet. Phil could only hear the thrum of the engine, and the sound of the tyres against the road. His parent were pleased, he could tell.

When he'd gotten down, Dan soon followed him, a small smile on his face as he followed Phil back into their house.

"Goodbye." Was all he'd said as he clapped Phil on the back, making Phil smile and repeat Dan's words, before the boy made his way shyly up the stairs.

Dan was confusing. He had mood swings, and Phil didn't know what to make of it. One minute, Dan is confident and seductive, the next he's careful and loving, the next he's shy and adorable, the next, there were too many words to describe Dan. He was everything at once, like he couldn't decide which personality he wanted. Phil didn't know if he loved that about him, or hated it.

After all these years, he'd forgotten how Dan really was, and only seen him as the popular heartbreaker, a jerk, not funny at all. He'd seen every quality he hated in people, and it was all because Dan was popular. All because he put up a front at school. That was why he was so confused by him now. What was his game? What was he thinking? Phil had no idea anymore, and that frustrated him immensely.

Phil sighed happily as he looked out of the window. He tried to ignore the look he saw his parents share, but couldn't help but see the smile on his mother's face, and the smirk on his father's.

"So Phillip, I assume your day was pleasant?" His father asked, still smirking as he turned into the next street.

"Oh... Uhm... yeah..." Phil mumbled, blushing as he moved his gaze to the floor of the car. "I had fun..."

"That's good. I told you Dan wouldn't hate you if you just talked to him!" His mother chirped. She seemed a lot happier about this than Phil was. Probably because she thought him and Dan were friends now, and that in turn, Phil would become friends with Dan's friends. She probably thought he'd become popular.

He wouldn't.

Once the summer was over, Dan would go back to ignoring him at school. What would happen then? Would they sneak kisses at every chance? Would they hug? Hold hands in private? What would they do behind closed doors?

Phil hoped Dan didn't expect sex. He was obviously a bottom, and he somehow knew how much it hurt to take. He thinks he can remember looking it up when he was younger. He'd have to research it again, if there were any more websites that the government hadn't paid to get rid of yet.

He's so consumed by his thoughts, that he's home before he realises. His mother taps on his window and smiles at him, bringing Phil out of his thoughts, as he quickly undid his seatbelt, and climbed out of the car.

When inside, Phil kicked off his shoes, and ran upstairs, flinging himself into his room and onto his bed. He buried his face in his pillow, sighing as he hugged it close. He was tired, but he had stuff to do.

Phil reluctantly rolled out of his bed, and opened his window to let the air in. He stood at his window for a little while, his eyes fluttering closed as he let out a content sigh. The wind was rushing through him at just the right temperature. He moved away after a few minutes, quickly taking off his shirt, and chucking it to the ground, before kicking his door shut.

It was good thinking to put his desk underneath his window, now he could work on his writing in peace. It wasn't homework, or anything like that, he just loved to write, so he did.

He was currently writing a novel about two best friends, they were both boys, and they had feelings for each other. They had to keep their relationship a secret though, because in their world, loving people of the same gender was taboo, forbidden.

Funny how he wrote his life without realising it.

He put his glasses on, and began to work, finally getting to the scene he's been thinking about for weeks. The first sex scene. He tries to keep it simple, and imply most things.

Soon, though, he got lost in his writing, and he was describing all the little touches, the breathy moans, and just how good it felt to have someone inside you. His breathing was laboured, and he swallowed, continuing to write until the boys reached their climax.

He leant back in his chair, whimpering. He somehow managed to get his hand inside his pants while typing. It was a subconscious thing.

He realised how hard he was though, as his eyes fluttered closed, and he finally moved his hand. He let out a moan, and bucked his hips, seeing chocolate eyes and mussed up hair behind his eyelids. He decided to let the fantasy fuel his fire, and soon, he was close.

He came after a few more firm strokes, whimpering someone's name. He couldn't get that fantasy out of his mind, it was probably the only thing that's ever made him cum so hard.

_There's a tanned, sweaty body above him, the boy is panting as he thrusts forward, making Phil cry out in absolute pleasure._

_Sweet, luscious, pink lips are attached to his neck, gently sucking, licking, biting as they moved lower. Phil gasps slightly as his lover nibbles on his collarbone, before moving again, this time to his nipples. Phil can't contain an ecstatic moan as the lips close around the bud, sucking it until it was hard, as slender fingers rolled his other nipple between two fingers._

_Phil's overwhelmed as he tangles his finger in dark hair, curly from sweat, bucking his hips and feeling his lover hit _that spot.

_"D-Dan!" He cries, letting a string of moans slip from his mouth as he tugged on the boy's hair._

_The boy looks up, a smile on his pretty, flushed face. Its Dan looking back at Phil, and he can't help but think that anyone else would seem wrong. So, he smiles as well, as the brunette lifts his head up, and they're kissing. Its slow and sensual, but its so heated, and Phil can already feel the coil in his stomach as Dan speeds up his thrusts, hitting that spot over and over and _over.

_His hand strokes Phil's member in time with his thrusts, and Phil is soon stumbling over the edge, yelling Dan's name repeatedly as he bucked his hips, and spurted his load all over his chest._

_Dan smiles, and begins licking it away, before he follows Phil, cumming deep inside him, and Phil whimpers weakly at the sensation, already sensitive and limp underneath Dan's attentions._

Phil shakes his head as he pants, trying to get the thoughts out of his head before he gets hard_ again. _He wipes away the sweat that's collected on his forehead, reaching over, and wiping away his cum, before tucking himself back in his boxers, and zipping up his trousers.

Did he seriously just fantasize about him and Dan having sex? They'd barely been together a day, and Phil was already horny. He'd have to deal with it though, because he didn't want to give his first time to Dan unless he was absolutely sure he was ready.

He wanted it to be right, he wanted it to be romantic and perfect and everything he's dreamed of. Maybe Dan didn't want that, but he wasn't going to convince him otherwise. Even if Dan's claim that he was still a virgin was true, Phil wasn't prepared to have sex with Dan for the first time, anywhere other than a bed. He was not going to let his first time be in a car just because they were horny.

That didn't mean handjobs and blowjobs were off the table if they got desperate. After all, they were horny teenagers.

Phil sighs a little as he chucks the tissues in the bin and stands up, stretching his arms out, and humming contently. He opened his eyes, while he was stretching, to see a guy across the road staring at him funnily. He shivered and moved away from the window, onto the bed. Had that creepy guy seen him? God Phil hoped not, that'd be weird and uncomfortable.

He groaned as he buried his face in his pillow, curling under the blankets, because it was getting dark, and it was already chilly. Funny how the weather changes so quickly in England. He's just about to fall into a comfortable sleep when-

***BEEP***

Its his phone, and he groans as he rolls over to grab it.

**_Dan: _**_Hey. Its Dan. I was wondering if maybe you'd like to come over this weekend? Maybe we could do something :)_

Dan. Of course. Of course it was Dan who woke him from his half-slumber. Of course it was the boy he was trying to ignore in his thoughts. After all, he still didn't know what he was to Dan, and he didn't like that.

_**Phil:** How did you get my number?_

He's kind of annoyed because Dan woke him up, but he knows that Dan was probably nervous about texting him, and its not like he knew Phil was asleep anyway.

_**Dan: **Maybe I'll tell you if you come over this weekend. ;)_

Phil rolled his eyes, sighing as he smiled fondly.

_**Phil: **Ugh. Fine. What are we going to do anyway?_

Maybe he was being a bit rough, but Dan was flirting, and it kind of made Phil uncomfortable, even though some part of him found it satisfying.

_**Dan:** Yay! :D And I don't know. Got anything in mind marshmallow? ;)_

Phil blushed as he read Dan's reply. He hadn't been called marshmallow since Dan and him stopped being friends.

There was a long story about the name, but now isn't really the time to tell it.

_**Phil: **I thought we agreed not to call me that /Danny/?_

By this point his face was a dark red as he thought of all the times Dan had called him marshmallow, and how intimate it sounded to him now. He could just imagine Dan calling him marshmallow as their orgasms faded away, his hands holding him in a gentle embrace as he leant forward.

He shouldn't be thinking this. But he is. And he's biting his lip because he so wants it to happen, he's almost desperate for it.

**_Dan: _**_But /marshmallow/ :c you know I love using that nickname. It suits you so well!_

**_Phil:_**_ But /Danny/:P _

**_Dan:_**_I'm okay with you calling me Danny =D its only when other people try to call me it that I get annoyed._

**_Phil:_**_... Is that supposed to be cute?_

**_Dan:_**_ Yeah._

**_Phil:_**_... It kinda is.:s_

**_Dan: _**_You're kinda cute, too, marshmallow. ;)_

**_Phil:_**_ shut up..._

**_Dan: _**_N'aw, I bet you're blushing now, aren't you._

_**Phil:** ..._

_**Dan:** You are! You're blushing, you cutie. _

**_Phil: _**_Ugh that's it. I'm going to bed._

**_Dan: _**_Nooo! But you're so cute!_

**_Phil: _**_Eh._

**_Dan: _**_Phillip. You are adorable._

**_Phil:_**_ Not really. But anyways, I do have to go to bed, I'm dead tired and I was almost asleep when you texted me._

**_Dan: _**_Oh really? Sorry._

_**Phil:** Its alright, its not like you knew._

_**Phil:** Anyways, good night Dan. :)_

_**Dan:** Goodnight Marshmallow. 3 **(A/N: Because 's a bitch, I have to tell you that's a heart)**_

Phil blushed as he turned off his phone, and snuggled under his blankets. He wasn't as tired as before, but it didn't take long for him to fall asleep.

He dreamt about him and Dan together, among other innocent things that filled his mind.

**Wow. This chapter was actually good. Its a bit of a filler, though we made some progress, Dan and Phil are texting, and Phil's going to see him on the weekend!**

**Oh and we had a little bit of smut (is it even smut if its just a fantasy?), some masturbation and just general awesomeness! ^_^**

**I really liked writing this chapter, and I hope you enjoyed reading it, too. I'm loving these long chapters :3**

**Remember to R&R, Follow if you want more, and favourite if you enjoyed this fic!**

**ALSO. I'm thinking of a video competition, if anyone's up for it. I was thinking, if you can, that you guys can make trailers for this fic, and then send me the link. The one with the most views wins! Your prize is one favour! I have to do absolutely ANYTHING that you tell me to do, just one thing though. That means you could make me write you something, make me do something. Like I said, ANYTHING.**

**What do you guys think? :)**

**OH AND Seven Devils is the theme of this fic in my mind so, if you guys can do that you will be the best.**


	4. Chapter 4

**Started writing this chapter ages ago, but lost inspiration. But then I saw SerenadeFlames13's trailer for this fic and I just _had _to finish this. The link will be on my profile after this chapter is posted. c:**

The weekend rolled around much quicker than Phil would have preferred.

Even though he spent the whole week waiting around for the weekend, texting Dan, but he won't admit that he did, because it sounded like he was clingy, and he kept himself as busy as he could during the holidays. No school, barely any chores. He got a lot of writing done.

He didn't want to be secretly glad that his week went by so fast, but he was, and that's a secret. If Dan ever found out, the teasing would never stop. Nor the flirting. And somewhere, in the back of his mind, a tiny voice said he didn't like that. But it was overpowered by the fact that this was _Dan_. The guy he had thought was a jerk, his old best friend.

He was so damn confused, because, just like Dan had personality swings, Phil was having mood swings. One minute, he'd be texting Dan, and he'd be blushing and happy with the flirting. The next thing he knows, he's flirting back, and hours have passed, and he has to go to bed. He lays awake for an hour after Dan has stopped texting, unable to sleep from his thoughts.

You see, when with Dan, its easy to fall into the flirting and the giggling and the _smiles. _Oh, the smiles. But when without Dan, things go topsy-turvy and Phil regrets and he thinks and he _thinks._ He shouldn't like the special attention Dan is giving him. He shouldn't even like Dan at all. He shouldn't be gay. He shouldn't even live!

But those are thoughts he hastily runs away from. He's not depressed, he's not.

His parents would beg to differ though, and even though they seemed satisfied with the way the week had played out, and the fact that Dan and him were going to hang out on the weekend, he knows he's walking on thin ice with the whole Boarding School thing. He only has the rest of the summer to make at least five good friends, and there's nobody in this stupid town that Phil doesn't already know. Which basically means he's screwed, because everybody he knows either hates him, or he hates them. There are the few exceptions of the people he doesn't know all that well.

Like that PJ boy he was lab partners with in Science that one time, because his best friend Chris had been away. The boy had been nice, and quite cool actually. Phil thought at the time that they could actually be friends, but, of course, the next day, Chris was back, and Phil was too shy to go up and talk to PJ while there was someone he didn't know sitting right next to him. When PJ noticed him, he had smiled, and waved him over, but Phil just gave him an awkward smile, and held up his hand in a silent 'no thanks, I'm good right here'.

PJ had shrugged, and continued his conversation with Chris that Phil couldn't hear, and he disappeared into the crowd. The next couple of days, he secretly hoped Chris would be away sick again, but no such luck. Every time he would walk over to see if PJ was eating lunch alone, Chris would be there, PJ would wave him over with a smile, and Phil would decline by a simple wave of his hand. Eventually, Phil gave up. He was never meant to have friends anyway.

It kind of hurt, knowing he was that shy that he couldn't try to make a new friend, just because there was another person with the boy he was trying to befriend. Phil got over it, though. He was a loner. He'd only ever had Dan, then Dan left to go be popular. Phil would have gone with him, but he hated meeting new people, and he had thought that he'd ruin Dan's new popularity with all his stuttering and blushing. It was silly. He could have stayed friends with Dan, and become popular. But, instead, he remained friendless and very, very shy.

He's trying to fix his fatal flaw, really, he is. But the only thing that's ever helped is Dan. So that's why he's walking over to Dan's house on an early Saturday morning. At least, that's what he tells himself is the reason. He doesn't want to admit that he just _wants _to see Dan, that he craves it. That would be weird.

When he gets to the front door, he realises how big of an idiot he is. What was he even doing there? He was so shy, and he wouldn't be able to talk to Dan's parents let alone knock on their door, because Phil knows Dan isn't awake before midday on the weekends (he has a part time job at Starbucks on weekdays during the holidays), and its currently nine in the morning. Dan won't be awake. Should he knock anyway?

After about ten minutes of standing outside the front door to Dan's house, in the slowly warming heat of summer, debating whether he should just knock or not, he finally decides. He walked a long way to get there, so he's not leaving without at _least_ trying. So, he knocks on the door, and waits. Soon, Dan's mum has opened the door, and is smiling at him. She's dressed like she's about to go for a run, and Phil remembers Dan telling him his mother was trying to lose weight over the phone.

"Hey, Mrs. Howell. Dan invited me over, I don't know if he told you." Phil said, smiling nervously as he played with some of his hair.

"Call me Jo, Phil. Everyone does." Jo said, smiling as she opened the screen door for him and let him inside. "Come on in, Dan's in his room, probably still asleep." She chuckled, closing the door behind him. "I was just about to go for a run, so I'll call him down, then I'll get out of your hair."

"Okay, thanks... Jo." Phil mumbled awkwardly, still playing with his hair as he blushed. Jo looked at him for a moment, connecting their eyes and making Phil shiver at the look she gave him. It was a knowing look. Like she could see his soul. Like she knew how to get all his secrets, and was peeling them off him one by one. It wasn't a pleasant feeling. Then, it was over just as fast as it had started. Phil shivered again.

"Dan! Get your butt out of bed! Phil's here!" She yelled quite loudly, shocking Phil. Sure, he'd heard Dan's parents fight before, and he'd heard Jo yell, but it seemed so quiet between the thick walls, with Dan's sobs in his ears, and his own comforting words. Hearing her yell so close to him made Phil realise why Dan's dad tried to quieten her whenever they had a fight.

After a few moments, Phil heard a groan and some movement, before it went silent. Then, there were quick footsteps and he heard Dan's door fly open. "Did you just say Phil's here?!" He yelled, making Phil smile slightly at the panic in his voice. He probably wasn't dressed or anything, and Dan had told him last night that he got distracted talking to Phil, so his room was still really messy. Phil didn't mind though, he didn't think Dan's room could be that much worse than Phil's.

"Yes! Now get down here and great your guest! I'm going for a run, I should be back in an hour." She called back, giving Phil a smile before she opened the door and left him alone with Dan, and his dad who would probably sleep until midday like his son normally would. Phil bit his lip and wondered whether he should wait for Dan, or if he should go up. Then, curiosity got the better of him and he quietly padded up the stairs. He hadn't seen Dan's room in years, it was probably completely different.

He was right. Dan had changed the wall's colour from a mustard yellow to bright reds and golds. There were swirls, dips, lines, everything together that made Phil's mouth drop open in wonder. His ceiling was crammed full of posters, pictures, and even old drawings that Phil had given to him when they were younger. Granted, the floor was practically a bomb site, filled with dirty clothes and the like, but Phil could look past the fact because Dan was scrambling around hurriedly to get his room clean.

Once he realised Phil was standing at the door, Dan froze, and slowly turned his head to look at him, like he was stuck in slow motion. His eyes were wide and filled with horror that kind of made Phil want to burst into giggles. Of course, he didn't, because that would be completely rude, so he wore a massive grin instead.

"Phil! What are you doing up here? Go back downstairs!" Dan said, rushing to the doorway, pushing Phil back and closing the door behind him. "I'm a mess and so is my room. I haven't had time to shower or clean or anything and my hair's all curly!" He rambled, pulling on his curls and making Phil giggle. "What are you doing here so early? I told you I wouldn't be awake until midday!"

"I think your hair is cute curly, and your room isn't that bad." Phil replied, before biting his lip to hold in a giggle. "Okay, _maybe _it is, but I don't care. Anyway, I came here early because my mum woke me up when she was going to work, and you know I can't go to sleep again once I've been woken up. So I got ready and came over." He shrugged, still grinning, but blushing once he realised he'd said he thought Dan was cute.

"You think I'm cute?" Dan asked, his panicked look turning into a grin. Phil blushed even more and thought it was just _great_ that the only thing he commented on was Phil's compliment. Phil understands his excitement, though, he's been rather reluctant to flirt or anything with Dan, and if he did, the boy would usually comment on it, and make Phil shut down again. This time was no exception.

Phil was still having trouble comprehending the fact that they were breaking the law. Even a stupid law is still a law, even if most people hate it.

"No!" Phil said hurriedly, blushing. "Look, I've already seen how messy it is, so why don't I just come in?" He asked, faking a sigh of annoyance. It made Dan reconsider, and soon he was sitting on a quickly-made bed while the brunette rushed around to clean. After about ten minutes, the room looked messier than when Dan had started, and the boy collapsed next to him on the bed.

"Ugh this is never going to be done!" He exclaimed, groaning. "But since we're both on the bed..." He said suggestively, winking at Phil, and making him wonder if Dan needed pills for mood swings.

"You're an idiot..." He mumbled, rolling his eyes at Dan. "An idiot who has curly hair and is currently wearing pyjamas, might I add." Phil giggled, biting his lip and hesitantly reaching his hand over to play with Dan's curls. They were loose and soft, like silk, and Phil could imagine spending all day lying there, his hands playing with Dan's hair as they kissed, burning, tanned hands sliding against his waist as the last rays of sun filtered through the window.

He was thinking to romantically now. This was dangerous.

"I'll go get changed in a minute..." Dan said quietly, his eyes fluttering shut as a soft sigh escaped his lips. "This is too nice..." He whispered, making Phil smile. Dan was halfway asleep already, and he'd happily sit there with him and play with his hair all day. But Dan really needed to get dressed, and it was too dangerous to stay in his room. They'd go to the tree house, where they could spring apart and pretend to be doing something once they heard someone was climbing the ladder. It was impossible to climb it quietly, it always squeaked and swung when you climbed it. Dan had tested it.

"Come on Dan." Phil said quietly, shaking Dan a little and prodding him. Dan still hadn't opened his eyes. "Go have a shower, I'll wait in the tree house." he mumbled, leaning forward and giving Dan a small kiss before getting up. Before he could take a step, though, something enclosed around his wrist, and pulled him back. He toppled back and landed above Dan. Luckily, he placed his hands down before they smashed heads, and he frowned. He opened his mouth to speak, but Dan just looked blankly at him and leant up for another kiss.

"I don't want to have a shower. I want to stay here, kissing you..." He mumbled against Phil's lips, making him blush and try to pull away. Dan slid his fingers into Phil's hair, making him shiver at the feeling, and effectively stopping him from pulling away. Now he was trapped, and Dan was slowly puling him down for another kiss.

Dan shuffled down the bed, and pulled Phil with him so they could kiss better. Now Phil's knees were either side of Dan's waist, and he really wasn't protesting. His hands gripped at Dan's shoulders needily as their lips moved in sync. Phil's heart was racing, and he was out of breath. Dan just kept that blank look, his eyes shut, while Phil's were half open. He loved watching Dan like this, so close up, but eventually his eyes slid closed, and he just let himself feel.

After what felt like hours of kissing (which was probably only really ten minutes) they broke apart, and Dan finally smiled, making Phil melt and struggle to return the lazy smile. "I have to go have a shower..." Dan mumbled, gently nibbling on Phil's bottom lip, making him moan softly, and think that Dan really wasn't going anywhere soon while he was still around. "But I wanna stay here and keep kissing you..." He said, not breaking the nibbling.

"I'll meet you in the tree house." Phil whispered, giving Dan an apologetic smile as he slid off the bed. He didn't want to break what they had, really, he didn't. But, he knew he'd stay there with Dan for hours if he didn't take charge and leave right then. "Then we can stay there all day. Oh, and don't straighten your hair. I want to play with your curls." He admitted, smiling shyly at Dan as he blushed.

Just as he left, Phil heard Dan whining incoherently, making him smile as he made his way downstairs, Dan's dad wasn't awake yet, so he easily slid outside into the backyard. He revelled in the fresh, cool air against his burning face. His lips were tingling, and he felt dizzy, more than anything he was just hot. Dan burned everywhere he touched on Phil. Every small trace of skin left him burning for hours, every tug of hair, squeeze of waist, tongues colliding, everything. Dan just burned him up and made him melt. It was like nothing he'd ever experienced. But it wasn't unpleasant.

He made his way over to the tree, and climbed the ladder. There were going to be so many memories here. It was the only safe place for them to meet. No one could see them from the ground, even if they were standing, and no one could sneak up. It was big enough to do all sorts of things, and it kind of felt like home, even after all these years. He spent his childhood up in this tree house, and now he's probably going to spend the rest of his teenage years in it. He wasn't complaining, it was a nice tree house, and a nice place to hide, but something else that would be nice; freedom.

Phil wanted to be free to love Dan in open and not get judged. Even if he went to other countries, he'd still be punished for loving Dan. After England said no to homosexuals, the other countries sort of followed. There wasn't a single place on the Earth that didn't agree. There was nowhere to run, nowhere to hide forever. If they kept this relationship going, they were bound to get caught one day. Did he really want that?

Phil sighed as he entered the tree house, and immediately flopped down onto the sofa. He had some serious thinking to do. Was Dan really worth it? No one had ever made him feel this way but... Was he worth the risk? Surely there would be other people he'd love. Surely this was just a faze. He'd become normal one day, and get a girlfriend. He was sure. Because this was just wrong.

But maybe he could just ride out this faze, and forget about it when he's older, and has a wife and kids. The idea doesn't appeal to him. Having a nice, normal family. A wife and three kids, in a nice house with a white picket fence. Or maybe they'd just live in an apartment, seeing as the picket fence is kind of an American thing. It just didn't fit. It wasn't right. They were the pieces to someone else's puzzle.

It made him realise that yeah, this totally wasn't a faze. And that if he wasn't careful, he'd end up falling for Dan. Then where would he be? He'd be breaking the law every day. It wasn't right. Not even remotely.

Phil sighed again, and played with the hem of his shirt, just as he heard someone climbing the ladder. He sat up immediately, excited to see Dan again, even though he couldn't have been up there for more than ten minutes. Thinking took up a lot of time.

"Dan" Phil said happily as the door swung open, revealing the tanned brunette wearing what was probably the hottest clothes Phil had ever seen.

Dan was a bastard.

But Dan was a _hot _bastard.

**So we're finally done! I hope you enjoyed, since this took a while to write. Hopefully the next chapter will be out sooner, but who knows? Anyway, like I said, link to the trailer will be on my profile soon. So check it out its amazing and perfect! :)**

**Remember to R&R, Follow if you want more, and favourite if you liked this fic!**

**I don't own Dan or Phil. I only own the writing and plot.**

**Bye guys!**


	5. Chapter 5

"I had a shower." was the first thing out of Dan's smirking mouth. "I got all dressed up for you, too" He winked, and it was true. Dan was wearing a black, leather jacket that was open, exposing his bare chest, which means that yes, he had no shirt on. As Phil's eyes explored Dan's torso his heart raced and he licked his lips. Dan was hot. His tight skinny jeans hung low on his hips, exposing the top of his hot, colourful boxers that made Phil want to tug down those jeans and get a better look at what Dan had to offer.

He didn't, of course. That would be totally inappropriate, and Phil was still cautious about their relationship. Besides, that was probably Dan's goal, to make Phil desire and see how he reacted. All week Dan had been testing him, whenever they texted or called each other, he'd flirt, and see how far he could go before Phil shut down again. As the days passed, it took a little more to get Phil to shut down. Pretty soon, he probably wouldn't resist any of Dan's seductive comments.

For now, though, he was still fighting. Even though Dan was walking over, that smirk still on his face as he crawled into Phil's lap. "D-Dan..." Phil whimpered, trying to squirm away, but Dan had already straddled his waist with his legs, and had his hands either side of his head on the sofa. "What are you doing?" He asked nervously, keeping still because Dan was sitting in his lap by that point, and moving would make things rather awkward.

"I'm about to kiss my boyfriend." Dan said simply, giving Phil one of his heart-melting, dimply smiles, before leaning in and pressing their lips together in a soft kiss. Phil immediately gave in and slid his right hand across Dan's cheek, into his hair. He could hear his heart pounding in his ears, and the sound of their lips reconnecting every couple of seconds, it kind of sounded dirty, but maybe that was just because of how wrong it was to Phil.

"Boy...friend?" Phil asked between kisses. Dan was holding him there, and he couldn't get away, so he only had a couple of seconds to talk every time Dan disconnected their lips, turned his head, then reconnected their lips again. Dan had just confirmed it. He'd just answered the biggest question that had been on Phil's mind all week. But with that question answered, more questions came. Like; How did he feel about being Dan's boyfriend? Was he really gay? Would their relationship remain a secret forever?

"Yeah... I mean if you want to be..." Dan said quietly, pulling away and looking into Phil's eyes, making him feel nervous. This was a huge decision, and Dan was putting him on the spot. He was breaking the law, and he didn't even know if he was gay! Dan was just a boy, surely there'd be others? It didn't really feel like it to Phil. He just felt so... Connected to Dan. His feelings for him were strong already. He didn't want to say no for obvious reasons. He liked Dan, liked being with him, talking to him, touching him, kissing him. It felt right. But he also didn't want to say yes.

Saying yes would set things in stone. Saying yes would mean he really was breaking the law. Saying yes meant a lot of things. But, saying yes meant that Dan was his. Saying yes meant he would no longer be jealous of whatever girl hung at Dan's arm, because Phil understands now. Its only a cover. He's sure that Dan likes him, Dan was the one who started all this, Dan was the one who had feelings first. He kissed Phil, not the other way round. It wasn't something out of a movie. Phil wasn't some girl. And Dan wasn't the guy who made a bet. He wasn't trying to make Phil love him. At least that was how it seemed.

Phil would know if he was being tricked.

Right?

"I...I think I want to be..." Phil mumbled nervously, blushing a bright red as his heart raced. He just admitted he wanted to be with Dan. Things were set now. There was no going back. Phil was in a secret, gay relationship with Dan Howell. It was wrong, it was against the law, but it felt right. It wasn't fair. Love was love, right? That was an old saying. So old, his grandfather barely said it anymore. Love wasn't love in a world where certain types of love were banned.

"That's great." Dan grinned, and then their lips were pressed together. Phil's heart raced, but he was getting used to it. He was just glad to be with Dan. Dan was perfect. Dan was his. He was Dan's. He had no time to think how wrong that was, though, because Dan's tongue soon pressed against Phil's lips, and he let out a small gasp at the feeling. They'd only done this once, so the feeling was completely new and it was exciting. He opened his mouth a fraction, letting in Dan's tongue as his fingers tangled into his hair.

They ended up kissing like that for what felt like forever, but what was probably only a couple of hours, judging by how high the sun was. Even though Phil really couldn't get enough of Dan, he was exhausted from all the kissing, so they had decided to stop for a while, and just cuddle on the sofa like a normal couple would do. Somehow, Phil ended up with his head on Dan's chest, their legs tangled together and their foots rubbing each other.

It was nice, just laying their with Dan, the brunette's left hand tangled with Phil's right, as his other played with Phil's hair, just like he had wanted to do to Dan's. It felt much nicer than he expected, but maybe that was just because it was Dan. Everything just sort of seemed better with Dan. His whole life seemed better. Before, he was so depressed, and he was dying, now... He didn't know. Things felt so good with Dan. But when he turned off his phone, and when he'll climb down the ladder... Things will be different.

Phil will have to pretend he's not in love with his boyfriend. Everything is a secret, and Phil has more than enough time to think, to regret. The kisses will still burn, the touches will remind him until he meets Dan again; its not right. Shame will weigh heavy on his shoulders. He'll hide in a cacoon of his duvet, his thoughts piercing his soul. Without Dan, he started to die all over again.

Before Dan had been so much easier. He had already been dead, he lived his life the same way every day, he came closer to pills with each breath, wanted to jump more each day. But that was okay, because he was used to being depressed. He wasn't used to not being depressed, then being depressed, then not being depressed again. The vicious cycle confused him, hurt him. Made him die inside slowly. He had thought he was already dead inside before, but it just turns out that he was only at the edge, pondering whether he should jump or not.

Now, he was falling, and sometimes he could deceive himself into thinking that he wasn't. Those were the times with Dan. However, when he was all alone, he just knew. He could see the ground getting closer, he was going to hit. He wasn't stupid enough to think that he was falling for Dan to catch him. Dan wouldn't be at the bottom. Dan would be running away, he'd be miles gone, because nobody really wanted Phil. They thought they did at first, but then they would realise that he's not worth the trouble.

That included his parents. It was why they were trying to send him to Boarding School. They didn't want to deal with it anymore, they didn't know how to fix him, so they weren't even going to try. They were going to offload him to someone else, so they could fix his problem. But Phil would never confess his secret to anyone. He'd never admit why he hates himself, so nobody could ever fix him. Not ever.

And he still tries to deceive himself, even when he's not with Dan. He won't even admit to himself that he's depressed, because he isn't. He just can't be. Now isn't a good time for him to be depressed. He should be happy with Dan.

"What are you thinking about?" He hears Dan murmur in his ear, and instantly all the bad thoughts are gone. He's with Dan, and he hadn't realised that Dan had stopped playing with his hair. That must be why all the bad thoughts filled his head.

"Not much, just... Things..." Phil replied quietly, so as not to disturb the peace. He quickly buried his face into Dan's warm chest, his dark hair falling onto Dan's shirt as he inhaled his calming scent. All his anxiety was gone now, he had no worries. Being with Dan was just bliss. He was never as calm as he was with Dan.

"You looked kind of worried, are you alright?" Dan asked, his hand beginning to play with Phil's hair again, as the raven-haired boy looked up again, missing Dan's scent already. He could probably still smell him if he tried hard enough, but he didn't want to seem creepy or anything.

"Fine." Phil mumbled, giving Dan a lazy smile as he melted under his touches. "I was just thinking about my mum and dad." He lied. "They're gonna send me to Boarding School if I don't have five friends by the end of the summer, so I was just wondering who I'd be good friends with. Most people in this town are just stupid, or annoying. There are the few exceptions of the people I don't know all that well, but I doubt I could make friends with them in time."

He felt bad for lying to Dan, but its not like he was going to admit that he was depressed. Dan would get worried, and he'd try to do things to make sure Phil was happy, when the only thing that made him _really_ happy, was just being there with Dan. Just relaxing, being cared for, receiving affection from the person he cared for most. Every other moment made him depressed, so there really was nothing they could do. Its not like they could be together every single moment forever. Even if they could, things wouldn't mean so much to Phil as they did. They'd take their time for granted.

"That sucks... Do you want me to introduce you to some people? I'd hate to see you go to Boarding School, then we'd never get time together." Dan said, giving Phil a sad look as he twirled a strand of hair around his finger.

"No! Its fine, I could probably just pretend they were my friends or something..." Phil mumbled, averting his eyes from Dan's. He didn't want to ask for help. He didn't want to admit that he needed it. He could do this on his own. Probably. Even if he couldn't, he was still too stubborn to ask for help. That meant he wouldn't even see Dan at school anymore. He'd only have his phone, and it sucked. He hated the way his parents treated the situation. Sure, he looked depressed, but that didn't mean he should go to Boarding School. What good would that do?

"Okay..." Dan mumbled cautiously. "Well, let me know if you need me. Anyway, I'm kind of getting hungry, want to go get some lunch?" He asked, smiling at Phil as he ran his fingers over Phil's knuckles. They were acting real cuddly, and as much as Phil liked it, he'd take any excuse to get off Dan right now. He just didn't know what to do in this relationship, he knew he was going to screw it up. He was still really anxious about getting caught, even with Dan.

"Yeah, I'm kind of hungry too." Phil smiled, sitting up and stretching as he yawned, he was so tired, just from laying with Dan. The brunette made him feel relaxed, even when he was worried or anxious. Dan was the perfect cure for depression. The only thing was, he was illegal. Phil shouldn't touch Dan in the way he does. He shouldn't be with him. But he is. And there's no turning back now.

Dan smiled as well, and slid out from underneath Phil. He stood up, and offered his hand, which Phil gladly took. "You're really cute, you know that?" Dan asked, still smiling warmly at Phil as he pulled him up. It reminded him of when he was there with Dan, when they first kissed. Except, this time, their chests didn't bump. Phil was pulled up semi-gracefully, and Dan squeezed his hand before letting go. Everything would be ruined if they opened the door still holding hands.

"I didn't, actually..." Phil blushed, ducking his head a little as he walked out, and started to climb down the ladder. Once they were down, he turned to Dan and gave him a small smile. "I think we should come up with something." He said as Dan started leading him inside. "You know, like an excuse for why we're going to be spending all our time up in there"

"Oh yeah, um... How about we're redecorating?" Dan asked, and Phil saw his hand twitch slightly, making him smile. Dan wanted to hold his hand. Of course, they couldn't, because Dan's neighbours or something might see. It was actually a pretty good idea, they could spend a few hours of their time together stripping the walls of pictures and things. Then they could repaint and put up posters, and move in clean furniture, maybe even a bed if they could do it without Dan's parents seeing. A bed would be much nicer to lay on than a sofa.

"Yeah, we could actually redecorate, too. We'll just say we were planning today, and the next time I come over we can get some work done, it'll be fun!" Phil cheered, grinning as Dan opened the back door, and led him quickly inside. "I've got a few ideas, too. We could make it look really cool." He said excitedly, making Dan chuckle as he walked into the kitchen.

"We'll do all that stuff next time, though. I just want to spend today with you." He said, making Phil blush as he followed Dan into the kitchen. "Now, what do we have...?" Dan mumbled, looking into the fridge. "Sorry. It looks like we can only have sandwiches." Dan sighed, pulling out some ham, tomato, lettuce, and cheese for himself.

"Its okay. You remembered I don't like cheese!" Phil giggled, smiling widely as he watched Dan butter the bread, and start to make the sandwiches.

"Of course I did! You complained every time my mum tried to put it on your sandwich when you were little. And you'd go crazy if your mum accidentally gave it to you at school." Dan smiled, putting the sandwiches on plates and taking them to the dining table. Phil quickly followed, and sat across from Dan at the table. He smiled at Dan, and started to eat, blushing slightly as he felt Dan's foot rub his ankle. "You have no idea how much I like you..." Dan mumbled quietly, making Phil blush even more as he rubbed Dan's foot back.

"I think I do..." Phil said quietly, smiling shyly at Dan as he continued eating. Small talk continued on for about ten minutes, and the flirtatious foot rubbing didn't stop until Dan's mum walked through the door. Phil retracted his foot quickly, blushing. They'd finished eating a little while ago, so they probably looked suspicious sitting like that.

"Oh, hey boys! How was your day?" Jo asked, smiling as she grabbed a towel she must have left out, and made her way over to them. Phil nervously fidgeted, feeling like Jo's eyes could see his soul. Like all his secrets were revealed. It was the same unpleasant feeling as before.

"Good." Dan said cheerily, he was always a good actor. He chatted with his mum for a while before Jo went into the kitchen to grab some water. "Phew." Dan whispered, chuckling softly. "That was pretty close. Are you still nervous? I don't think she saw anything..."

"I don't know... It feels weird." Phil mumbled, looking at the kitchen worriedly. "Its like every time she looks at me, she can see through me. Like she know all my secrets or something. Its kind of creepy..." He said nervously, shivering again as Dan's mum returned.

"You're being silly. My mum doesn't know anything." Dan smiled, returning to talking to Jo again. He felt weird sitting there, watching them talk but not joining in. Jo's eyes flickered between them, and they held that same knowing look that they had that morning. It made Phil shiver repeatedly, and Jo asked him if he was cold, he shook his head and gave her a small smile as Dan looked at him with a curious expression. He was asking Phil if he really was okay with his eyes, so Phil gave him a smile as well.

After a couple of minutes of Phil awkwardly sitting there while Dan and his mum talked, Phil's phone rang. It was his mum calling. He quickly answered it, glad to get a distraction. "Mum?" He asked quietly into the phone. His mother barely ever used her phone, she said it was mostly for emergencies.

"Hello sweetie. Listen, I know you're with Dan at the moment, but your father and I need to talk to you, can you come home now? I'm really sorry, I know you're having fun, but this is important." His mother spoke, her voice awfully quiet and broken-sounding. They'd probably had a fight. Were they splitting up? Phil didn't know if he could handle that. At any rate, it was bad news, and it sounded like Phil needed to get there quickly.

"Okay. I'll be there as soon as I can." Phil sighed, biting his lip as he hung up. "I'm really sorry, but something's happened. My mum sounds really upset, like she's had a fight with dad. I'm sorry but I have to go. They need to talk to me." He apologized, frowning sadly as he stood up and pushed his chair back in. He went to go put his plate in the sink, but Jo just pushed him back with a sad smile and took the plate. Phil was kind of grateful.

Dan walked him to the door, with a sad look. "Its gonna be fine..." He said quietly, taking Phil's hand and giving him a sympathetic smile. He looked around, before leaning in, and giving Phil a small kiss. "I know it is. And even if it isn't, I know you're strong enough to handle it. I'm here if you need me, just give me a call, okay?" He asked, squeezing Phil's hand sadly as he opened the door.

"Thanks Dan." Phil said quietly, letting go of Dan's hand as he slid outside. "I just want you to know that I really like you, too..." He mumbled, giving Dan a sad smile before he walked away. He just admitted that he liked Dan, a lot. It was so wrong, but he needed the comfort at that moment, and his heart just melted at the way Dan's face lit up at the confession. He really did like him. He'd probably be dead without him.

He thought about everything on his way home, his relationship with Dan, the way Jo looked at them as if she knew, his parents, how broken his mother's voice sounded. He wasn't as strong as Dan thought, this wasn't going to be fine. Without Dan, everything caught up with him, as always, and he was thrown into a deeper depression than before. He was falling faster, he could see the ground now. It was still so far away, but it was close enough to frighten Phil half to death.

After a while of walking, his thoughts swimming around in his head, poisoning everything, Phil was finally standing outside his house. He was shaking, even though it wasn't cold in the afternoon summer air. He slid the key into the lock, hands shaking more than anything in his body. He was so scared something horrible had happened. He couldn't cope. He turned the lock slowly, his heart jumping at the metallic 'click' of the door unlocking. What would he find behind this door? Was someone dead, had they been robbed? He just didn't know!

He turned the knob with deft fingers, swinging the door open as his breath caught in his throat. He'd never been so scared before. Everything could go wrong from here. He could fall faster. He could hit the pavement. He could die. He walked in, the door shutting itself behind him as he slowly walked down the hallway. His footsteps seemed loud against the wood, and everything slowed down as he stepped into the living room.

Was he going to hit?

**Wooow. I wonder what will happen? :D Who knows? This took days of pushing through writer's block to write. I started writing this as soon as the last update, and I've been writing bit by bit since. I guess its worth it because this chapter is over 3000 words again! I hope I'm not just writing crap, seriously. I felt like half of this was just Phil's thoughts, honestly, so I'm wondering if you even really care. O.o**

**I'm thinking of making updates like a weekly thing, what do you guys think? If we did this, then you'd have to be really tough if I missed the update time. Like, spam me with messages about how lazy I am or otherwise I won't get it done XD I think of you all as my friends, so I'll probably whine about being lazy, and having a lot to write. Don't worry though, I love you all so spamming me to get me to update won't make me mad at all!**

**Anyways, as usual, I hope you enjoyed this fic!**

**Remember to R&R, follow if you want more, and favourite if you enjoyed this fic!**

**Bye guys!**


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